One of my absolute favorites
Written by one of my favorites!
BY EDGAR ALLAN POE
Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore—
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.
“’Tis some visitor,” I muttered, “tapping at my chamber door—
Only this and nothing more.”
Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December;
And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow;—vainly I had sought to borrow
From my books surcease of sorrow—sorrow for the lost Lenore—
For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore—
Nameless here for evermore.
And the silken, sad, uncertain rustling of each purple curtain
Thrilled me—filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating
“’Tis some visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door—
Some late visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door;—
This it is and nothing more.”
Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
“Sir,” said I, “or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore;
But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping,
And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door,
That I scarce was sure I heard you”—here I opened wide the door;—
Darkness there and nothing more.
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before;
But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, “Lenore?”
This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, “Lenore!”—
Merely this and nothing more.
Back into the chamber turning, all my soul within me burning,
Soon again I heard a tapping somewhat louder than before.
“Surely,” said I, “surely that is something at my window lattice;
Let me see, then, what thereat is, and this mystery explore—
Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore;—
’Tis the wind and nothing more!”
Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter,
In there stepped a stately Raven of the saintly days of yore;
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;
But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door—
Perched upon a bust of Pallas just above my chamber door—
Perched, and sat, and nothing more.
Then this ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,
By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore,
“Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou,” I said, “art sure no craven,
Ghastly grim and ancient Raven wandering from the Nightly shore—
Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night’s Plutonian shore!”
Quoth the Raven “Nevermore.”
Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly,
Though its answer little meaning—little relevancy bore;
For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being
Ever yet was blessed with seeing bird above his chamber door—
Bird or beast upon the sculptured bust above his chamber door,
With such name as “Nevermore.”
But the Raven, sitting lonely on the placid bust, spoke only
That one word, as if his soul in that one word he did outpour.
Nothing farther then he uttered—not a feather then he fluttered—
Till I scarcely more than muttered “Other friends have flown before—
On the morrow he will leave me, as my Hopes have flown before.”
Then the bird said “Nevermore.”
Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken,
“Doubtless,” said I, “what it utters is its only stock and store
Caught from some unhappy master whom unmerciful Disaster
Followed fast and followed faster till his songs one burden bore—
Till the dirges of his Hope that melancholy burden bore
But the Raven still beguiling all my fancy into smiling,
Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of bird, and bust and door;
Then, upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking
Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore—
What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt, and ominous bird of yore
Meant in croaking “Nevermore.”
This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing
To the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom’s core;
This and more I sat divining, with my head at ease reclining
On the cushion’s velvet lining that the lamp-light gloated o’er,
But whose velvet-violet lining with the lamp-light gloating o’er,
She shall press, ah, nevermore!
Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer
Swung by Seraphim whose foot-falls tinkled on the tufted floor.
“Wretch,” I cried, “thy God hath lent thee—by these angels he hath sent thee
Respite—respite and nepenthe from thy memories of Lenore;
Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe and forget this lost Lenore!”
Quoth the Raven “Nevermore.”
“Prophet!” said I, “thing of evil!—prophet still, if bird or devil!—
Whether Tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore,
Desolate yet all undaunted, on this desert land enchanted—
On this home by Horror haunted—tell me truly, I implore—
Is there—is there balm in Gilead?—tell me—tell me, I implore!”
Quoth the Raven “Nevermore.”
“Prophet!” said I, “thing of evil!—prophet still, if bird or devil!
By that Heaven that bends above us—by that God we both adore—
Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, within the distant Aidenn,
It shall clasp a sainted maiden whom the angels name Lenore—
Clasp a rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore.”
Quoth the Raven “Nevermore.”
“Be that word our sign of parting, bird or fiend!” I shrieked, upstarting—
“Get thee back into the tempest and the Night’s Plutonian shore!
Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken!
Leave my loneliness unbroken!—quit the bust above my door!
Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!”
Quoth the Raven “Nevermore.”
And the Raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door;
And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon’s that is dreaming,
And the lamp-light o’er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;
And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor
Shall be lifted—nevermore!
The air feels cold this morning.
The light dimmer through the rowan trees.
I lie here in that liminal morning place
Under a cool cotton duvet.
Sleeping cat at my feet.
The alarm bleeps at me to get up.
Today will be a good day I promise
I concentrate on my breath
A blackbird sings reminding me of the beauty of my canal bank
I pull up the wooden blind
For this new day.
I hate you grief.
Your cruel and uncaring.
It’s almost a year.
Eight more days.
You’ve poked at me this week.
Reminded me constantly.
I know how long it is since I lost her.
Since I lay beside her.
I have had our grand daughter today.
I brush her hair and sing nursery rhymns
Telling her of her two nanny’s adventures.
She goes home with her dad and I get in my car and head out in the rain.
I’m meeting friends in the next village.
Your there waiting as I pass the old collery
Hunched craftilly waiting in the shadow of the derilict pit head.
Like one of those police traps covered in nails
You make me stop my car and pull over.
There is a screaming a howl from the depths of my soul.
Almost 365 days
It’s raining . Pouring the mist covers the mountain tops like grey cotton wool.
I miss you I sob into the air of this dimension knowing you hear me on the astral.
Not one of my family has ever asked how I am.
Don’t they know that
I’m lonely without you
I miss you.
For fucks sake I shout
Everyone always thought u was the strong one
They were wrong
My strength was you.
The rain runs down my windscreen cars wizz past the layby
Get a grip I tell myself
Grief flows like the rain
As it turns to drizzle
I catch my breath
Please stop for just awhile .
I dry my eyes
Take a deep breath and keep going.
It’s the only option I have
Walking around the lake today with Mavis her last post op appointment at the vets.
Everything is fine.
Although she’s developed that dog planking thing they do when approaching the vets door and suddenly realizing where they are.
Accompanied with a hysterical bark far too loud for such a tiny dog.
To reassure her I she isn’t staying as we leave i fuss her then walk her across the lake to Jeff’s garage were I’ve left my car.
The lake has outdoor gym equipment surrounded by visiting Canadian geese basking in September sunshine
Middle aged men in office attire attempt to lift themselves pulling and pushing at lime green bars casually walking away after failed out of breath attempts.
I sit on a bench watching mams with kids chase balls dogs and toddlers on scooters dropping quavers and melting ice creams .
Get down, and be careful echos in the warm breeze.
As the mothers smile but silently count down the days to back to school.
Men sit fishing eyes closed multiple rods balenced on stands beside them. Plastic sandwich boxes and flasks of tea
Bright red Rowen berries sicamore seeds and blackberries whisper of autumn and the wheel of the year begining to turn.
I love this time of year.
So many shades of green
I feel so very blessed to live here in Wales
There is truly no where else so beautiful
I am grateful every day.
I write every day.
In my phone’s note pad.
My work diary on printer paper.
My head is like a theater stage sometimes as I’m driving I’ll have first few lines of a poem float onstage
I’ll pull over to note them down least I forget.
Storytelling and poetry is such an ancient way of learning. Passing on information.
The druids are a good example spoken word.
My other favorite thing is second hand I was going to say clothes but to be fair it’s every thing.
I have an old oak dining table I bartered for at a car boot sale it has four odd chairs.
It’s role has morphed into a desk a very untidy desk!
Paper note books, Books I’m reading there is always more than one.
There is something comforting to me anout old furniture, pre loved that have belonged to other families been a part of other stories now they are part of mine. I especially like it when things don’t match.
Cups and plates I have an old Welsh dresser with beautiful odd china plates and cups
I bought it for our cottage not thinking of how it would fit through the front door ! Everything here is second hand apart from the mattress.
Old cottage, old furniture. Im sure if I added up how much I’d spent it would be under £800 for the whole house.
We live in such a disposable society.
I think if I’ve got a bedroom chest of drawers that does the job why will I ever need to change it.
I love second hand shops, car boot sales charity shops.
All my clothes are pre loved
There is a Fab charity shop by my office
A little old lady runs it raising money for animal charities.
She has a few just a pound rails.
I never fail to find what I need in her shop.
It reminds me of a childrens program from the 70s called Mr Ben.
Mr Ben was an ordenary man he would go into a shop try on a costume then step through the mirror into another world to a new adventure.
That’s how I feel in Jeans shop.
I love it when girls in work comment on some thing Im wearing and I can say it was a £1.00 🤣
Anyway I’m off on a tangent I was asked to a rarther posh awards ceremony few weeks ago.
Our cancer retreat had been nominated.
Everyone going chatted about what they were going to wear.
How much they had paid where it was from.
Hair make up.
You get the picture.
I moaned to Jeff I’m not spending money on something I won’t wear again he laughed well you need something new go shopping he encouraged me.
I hate shopping.
I reluctantly got myself ready for a trip into Cardiff.
But thought I’d call into Jeans shop first.
Off went like Mr Ben looking for a new adventure
I tell her my dilemma as I look through rails of clothes.
I have to admit I was starting to panic.
What if we win an award?
What if I have to get up on stage?
I turn around to leave resigned to fact I have to go into town crowds of people and hassle of car parks
Thanks Jean I say turning to leave then
There behind me on a rail I’m sure I’ve already looked on is a dress.
Bell sleaves it’s stunning
How much is this Jean.
I say holding it against me its perfect.
£5.00 to you darling she says
Have a wonderful evening.
Thank you Jean you saved the day. She laughs
That night I dress put on my red and black boots Wow Jeff says that’s stunning.
No don’t be silly.
We step through that magic mirror and two hours later I stand on stage accepted the beautiful award with my beautiful daughter in law Sarah,
I talk about Ravens retreat the work that we do and my beautiful brave friend Donna. (Sarah’s Mam) this award and everything I do is dedicated to her.
Im surrounded by beautiful women in designer dresses who had spent the day in the salon.
I don’t feel out of place.
I’d spent the day on the mountain and a hour with Jean in her magical shop.
I stood on stage to have a photo Lou whispered joolz I love the red dress.
£5.00 I smiled from jeans shop I just couldn’t resist and i know Donna would approve.
Sleep where are you?
Why have you forsaken me?
We were never best friends
Aquantances at best.
The barn owl calls to me at 3.30am
To remind me of the beautiful nocturnal world I am now a affiliated member of.
Fox cubs play amongst the dying hollyhocks
Hedgehogs feast on fat slow slugs shimmering sliver ribbon trail their only trace.
Illumination… The Moon card of the tarot pack
Reminds me that the world looks completely different in her misty lamp light.
For those who have the joy of sleep.
Do not see the magic of this stary world.
A magical world of beauty .